Posted in Pre-Race Thoughts by Jenna Sasso on 3/22/2012
This is a short and sweet post.
It's been awhile since I've blogged. Not that I don't have a lot to say. I just have so much to say lately that I haven't even attempted to write.
A lot of life has transpired since the last blog. A lot of questions. A lot of hurts. A lot of laughter. A lot of disappointments. A lot of memories.
This blog is just my way of saying "I'm alive!" "I'm still seeking the Lord and all that He has planned for me!"
This past weekend, I got the reference to Isaiah 49:16 tattooed on my wrist.
That Scripture says, "See, I have engraved you on the palm of My hands. Your walls are ever before me."
In this last month, that has been my greatest joy and my greatest comfort.
Through it all, even my mistakes in the last month, my name is engraved on the very palm of the God who created the universe I dwell in. He's got my back. He sees. He knows. He has a beautiful plan in spite of it all.
For that, I am thankful.
Tonight, I have peace in knowing that God is sovereign and His timing is impeccable.
I am excited to see what He has planned for tomorrow.
I am excited to see what He has planned for next week.
I am excited to see what He has planned for LIFE.
"Hand on my heart this much is true: there's no life apart from You. Lay me down. Lay me down."
Here I am, Lord. All surrendered. All for You. Whenever. Wherever. However.
| |
|
Posted in Pre-Race Thoughts by Jenna Sasso on 2/27/2012
For the record, I'm writing this blog in tears. Tears of longing...longing to be all that Jesus asks, longing to do all that He commands. And tonight, that command is something simple. To some, it may even seem silly.
In Luke 12:33, Jesus says, "Sell your possessions and give to those in need. This will store up treasure for you in heaven! And the purses of heaven never get old or develop holes. Your treasure will be safe; no thief can steal it and no moth can destroy it."
About a year ago, the Lord pressed upon my heart that I was to take this literally. At some point in my life, I was to sell everything so that I could give to those in need. So that I could GO to those in need.
For the most part, I am not materialistic, so I didn't have a problem with this command. Then, I basically had this conversation with God:
Me: Lord, I would absolutely give up everything to go to the nations! Just put people in my path who will purchase my things, and I'll do it!
God: Oh really? You'd give up EVERYTHING?
Me: Yes! Of course I would!
God: All of the dishes you bought for your future home one day?
Me: Definitely.
God: All of the books you cherish and love?
Me: That might be a little more difficult, but I would!
God: Your computer?
Me: Ha. Yes. I spend most of my time frustrated with it anyways. It would be a little bit of an adjustment, but I wouldn't miss it all that much.
God: You seem pretty serious about this.
Me: I am, I am! Anything to share Your name with people who haven't heard it!
God: Hmmm, there's one more thing, though.
Me: Yes, God! I will sell it! You don't even have to ask!
God: So you would sell your Cricut machine?
Me: Ohhhhhh. Well, um, actually, I don't know...I waited a long time for that. I use it a lot, and it would be a great ministry tool! I could bring it to the world with me. It would help me prepare Sunday School lessons and activities...
God: Jenna, I know it will be difficult, but will you please sell it?
Unfortunately, that is where this conversation ends. That was a year ago, and my Cricut machine is still sitting in my craft room, waiting to be "taken to the nations". For those of you wondering, a Cricut machine is a die cutting tool used to cut out thousands and thousands of different shapes and fonts and such. I use it a lot for making cards, doing projects, and creating scrapbooks. It would be a great tool in an orphanage one day.
But for now, God is asking me to sell it. And that hurts. Like I said, this may sound silly to some. But I just can't seem to let go!
Tonight, God challenged me with that question again. Except this time He made it seem more urgent:
God: Jenna, I have much to give you! Much to show you!
Me: Ahh! I can't wait to see it all! You are so good to me!
God: But Jenna, first I'd like you to be faithful to me in one thing.
Me: Yes God! Anything!
God: I'd like you to sell your Cricut.
Me: Ohhhh. I'm not ready yet...
God: Let me ask you this: if your sister or one of your best friends were living in poverty, what would you do to help them?
Me: Oh Lord, I'd do anything!
God: Would you even sell your Cricut?
Me: Absolutely! Without a second thought! Their well-being is worth so much more than that silly machine!!
God: (I imagine with tears in His eyes) Oh Jenna, that is how I feel about my children all around the world! I wish you could grasp that, because if you did, you wouldn't have a second thought about selling your Cricut machine!
Me: (also in tears at this point) I get it now. Oh how deeply I get it. You've broken my heart for Your children. Tonight, I resolve to do whatever it takes to help them.
God: Even if that means selling your Cricut machine?
Me: Yes Lord, even that. They are worth so much more than that silly machine.
So that's it. With tears in my eyes and a hurting heart, I'm giving up my Cricut for the purposes of the Kingdom. Silly? Maybe a little. But a struggle none the less. A struggle that took a year to resolve. A struggle that probably won't be completely over until I'm holding another orphan or praying for another sick man. At that point, I will look down and say "You are worth SO much more than my silly Cricut machine."
I am choosing to be faithful in this small thing, and trusting that God will be faithful in the bigger things. My challenge to you is the same. If God is leading you to sell even the smallest thing or give even the smallest amount, DO IT! Whether it is to my missions trip or to another ministry, DO IT! And share your stories with me! Let's sit back and watch how God moves when we are willing to obey in the simplest of forms.
| |
|
Posted in Pre-Race Thoughts by Jenna Sasso on 1/29/2012
The following is my journal entry from my quiet time with Jesus this morning:
For the longest time, Isaish 58: 10 - 12 has been one of my favorite portions of Scripture and has become my mission statement for the Race and probably for life. This morning, I decided to read all of chapter 58, and I was kind of convicted...the first 5 verses speak of what the typical person's idea of fasting is: seeking the Lord, eager to know His ways, wondering why the Lord hasn't appeared.
Essentially, God says, "Well that's great, but it doesn't count when your days end in strife, or when you don't live the right way or follow My commands."
And then verses 6 and 7 are the whammies: "Is not this the kind of fasting I have chosen: to loose the chains of injustice and untie the cords of the yoke, to set the oppressed free and break every yoke? Is it not to share your food with the hungry and to provide the poor wanderer with shelter - when you see the naked, to clothe him, and not to turn away from your own flesh and blood?" Woah.
How many times have I sought the Lord and His ways in the morning, only to turn and slander, lie, and gossip my way through some days???
I can fast, pray, and study my Bible all day, but if I'm not living right, if I'm not loosing the chains of injustice, giving shelter to poor wanderers, or clothing the naked, then what's the point?! And I don't think this part of the Bible is metaphorical, either. I think He literally means to set the oppressed free, feed the hungry, and clothe the naked. It's time to stop sitting in the comfort of my 4 walled house with 20 pairs of shoes, clothes that I don't even wear, and food that sometimes gets thrown out.
It's time to start living life the way God intended.
Lord, show me where in my life I have gone wrong. Maybe not all in one day, because I think that would be depressing. Take me through a process. Teach me about the things that I've been getting wrong.
If I don't live the way You've asked me to, then I might as well not study my Bible.
Why read something if I'm not willing to follow it? Father, I want to loose chains, untie cords, and set the oppressed free. I want to be, as verse 12 says, a Repairer of Broken Walls, a Restorer of Streets with Dwellings. Not for my glory or renown. All for Yours. Open my eyes to the injustices and the yokes. Help me to see the oppressed. Don't let me walk on by anymore. I put my "good-Christian" agenda aside to live as You would have me live.
I'm ready to see some freedom dances!!!!
| |
|
Posted in Pre-Race Thoughts by Jenna Sasso on 12/31/2011
Every New Year's Eve, many people, before watching the ball drop, double check their New Year's Resolutions list one more time. Last year, I got tired of that.
So I did something different.
Inspired by my local Christian radio station, I decided to pick ONE word that I wanted to define my 2011 year. The word I picked?
Radical.
It was a great idea, because it kept me inspired and focused throughout the whole year. I often referred back to that word, and made sure that as many moments as possible could live up to it. And for the most part, my year was definitely radical.
But now it's December 31, 2011. Time for a new word.
So I went to God. And I asked Him: "Lord, what do you want from me this year? In one word, what would you like to see my 2012 look like?" The answer I kept hearing over and over?
Passionate.
Passionate about what?
Passionate while I finish up 6 months in the States.
Passionate while I finish my last semester for my Associate's.
Passionate while I'm praying/raising funds for the Race.
Passionate about my time here, even though my heart is aching to be in Kenya.
Passionate about each country while on the Race, taking advantage of every moment to share Jesus in a practical way.
Passionate about my relationships with people, putting more effort into them.
Passionate about my job.
And most importantly, passionate about Him, seeking Him in ALL moments and surrendering to His will no matter the cost.
In the dictionary. "passionate" is defined as having, compelled by, or ruled by intense emotion or strong feeling.
So today, on the eve of 2012, I commit to being ruled by intense emotions and strong feelings in each of the above mentioned things.
I'm expecting big things this year.
If God is for me, who can be against me?
Lord, give me a passionate heart.
| |
|
Posted in Pre-Race Thoughts by Jenna Sasso on 12/25/2011
Bias: a particular tendency or inclination, especially one that prevents unprejudiced consideration of a question.
Let me just say it now and get it off my chest: I am biased towards a certain country on the Race. I know, I know, being biased is unfair to all of the other countries! But I can't help it. I'm in love. With?
KENYA!!!
You see, it's really not my fault. I lived there this past summer and fell in love with the culture and the people. The month before we go to Kenya is probably going to be the hardest month of all for me, because I'll be lost in anticipation for the next month! And don't even think about asking me to leave after a month...I may just finish my Race there. Not gonna lie.
My tendency or inclination is to Kenya, and yes, it definitely causes prejudiced consideration of anything else. Why would I want to go anywhere else when my heart has told me that Kenya is home? To be honest, I'm not sure. I just know that for now this is what God has asked of me, so guess what? I'm gonna do it. And I'm really gonna try hard not to be biased.
It's easy for me to love 95% of people, so I'm sure I won't have a problem in the other countries (God is working on me, helping me figure out how to love the other 5%). I'm going to bring Jesus to Ireland, Russia, Ukraine, Tanzania, Mozambique, India, Nepal, Cambodia, Asia, and Malaysia just as much as I'll bring Him to Kenya. But I can almost guarantee that the biggest piece of my heart will be left in that beautiful country.
Do you want a piece of your heart left in those countries too? Consider giving. Consider GOING. Either one is needed! If you feel led to give, click on the "Support/Help Send Me" link to the left. If you feel like going, visit theworldrace.org and check it out. Your life won't be the same. THAT I can guarantee.
| |
|
Posted in Pre-Race Thoughts by Jenna Sasso on 12/22/2011
I know. Some of you are thinking "What in the world? Why on earth would she be writing her wedding vows before she has even met the man she is to marry?!" Well, they're not exactly vows between a man and myself. They're vows between God and myself.
After I had my interview for the World Race, I started a fast that included no television or internet, among other things, until the minute I got the phone call saying whether or not I had been accepted. I wanted to take time to spend extra time in prayer and in the Word, to see where God was leading. During this time, I was reading in Isaiah, and something ocurred to me: I've been wearing a commitment ring for almost 2 years now, signifying my life sold out to Christ, my "marriage" to Him............but I never had written any vows down that I could go back to in difficult times. As I read Isaiah 54 - 56:8, the Lord showed me how that passage of Scripture could be turned into our wedding vows. So after some prayer and some time dwelling on these verses, here are my vows to the Lord, written November 6, 2011, symbolized by the ring I wear on my wedding finger, until the day it is replaced by a man's wedding band, Lord willing.
Today, I enter into a covenant with the Lord, my Maker and my husband (Isaiah 54:5). Lord, from this day forward, I commit to seeking You above all else (55:6). I commit to calling on You in times of rejoicing and in times of need (55:6). I commit to singing, bursting into song, and shouting for joy, because you are good to me (54:1). I commit to turning to You when I have messed up (55:7), and yet I will not bare shame because You have forgiven me (54:4). I commit to keeping the Sabbath, careful to honor You even more so on that day (56:4). I commit to serving You in whatever way You ask of me (56:6), keeping my hands from evil at all times (56:2). I commit to forsaking my ways and thoughts (55:7), seeking, instead, to choose what pleases You (56:4). I will listen to You (55:2), and as You lead, I will go where You lead, do as You ask, and say what You tell me to (54:2). I will not hold back, but will stand firm in Your guidance (54:2). When I am thirsty, I commit to going first to Your refreshing waters (55:1). When I am hungry, I will seek You, and You alone (55:1). When afflicted, lashed by storms, and not comforted (55:11), I will not be afraid (54:4). I commit to maintaining justice and doing what is right (56:1). I will not fear disgrace (54:4). Lord, today I bind myself to You (56:6), committing to love Your Name (56:6), worship You in every moment (56:6), and give offerings and sacrifices that will glorify Your name and further Your kingdom (56:7). Above all, I commit to holding fast to this covenant (56:4). Until death do us meet.
And here is the Lord's to me:
Today, I enter into a covenant with Jenna, my daugther and my beloved. Jenna, I am your Maker and your Husband (54:5). I, the God of all the earth, am your Redeemer (54:5). I have compassion on you (54:10), and commit to having mercy on you (55:7) and freely pardoning you (55:7). You will go out in joy and have peace in all you do (55:12), because I delight in giving you those things (56:7). When you go out, the mountains and hills will burst into song before you and the trees of the field will clap their hands Youwill summon nations that do not know you, and they will hasten to You because, Jenna, I have endowed you with splendor (55:5). Tyranny and terror will be far from you; you will have nothing to fear (54:14). you will accomplish what I desire and achieve the purpose for which I sent you (55:11). If anyone attacks you, it will not be my doing, but they will surrender to you (54:15). No weapon forged against you will prevail, and I will enable you to refute every tongue that accuses you (54:17). During difficult situations, do not give up: my salvation is close at hand my righteousness will soon be revealed (56:1). Trust me: my thoughts and ways are not like yours: they are higher (55:8-9). I will spread you out to the right and to the left, and your descendants will dispossess many nations (54:3). I will build you and your family with stones of turquoise, your foundations with sapphires (54:11). When you listen to me, your soul will live (55:3) and will delight in the richest of fare (55:2). I will give you a memorial and a name better than sons or daugthers that will nto be cut off (56:5). Though the mountains be shaken and the hills be removed, my unfailing love for you will not be shaken, nor will my covenant of peace leave you (54:10). This covenant, like my faithful love to David, is everlasting(55:3). And one day, Jenna, it will be my joy to bring you to my holy mountain (56:7).
Until death do us meet.
I am His, and He is mine. Always and forever.
| |
|
Posted in General Posts by Jenna Sasso on 12/19/2011
I was heading towards the American dream. I was in college, with plans on finishing my Bachelor's degree in Psychology, and then going on to get my Masters. I was dating a great guy, with plans to get married one day and raise a family together. We would be comfortable in our house with a 2 car garage, the white picket fence, and the front porch with rocking chairs.
But then God wrecked me.
I spent the summer of 2011 in Kenya, Africa, ministering and loving on people, sharing Jesus with them on a daily basis. My heart was officially attached to missions. I absolutely loved the idea of waking up every day with the sole purpose of sharing Jesus with these people who I grew to know and love.
Before I even returned to American soil, I began to ask God, "Okay, what's next?" He began to stir the World Race in my heart. Mostly, I was excited. But there were those moments when I had the thoughts such as, "But I'll have to give up life for a year", "I'll have to completely abandon myself to Christ", "I'll have to put my American Dream life on hold." And the scariest thought of all: "I may have to give up my guy."
Then something ocurred to me.
Those things are exactly what Jesus asks of me! He asks me to give up my life, abandoning myself to His plans for me. And He even asks that I be willing to leave behind the people that I love. In Matthew 10:34-37, Jesus says, "Don't think I've come to make life cozy. I've come to cut—make a sharp knife-cut between son and father, daughter and mother, bride and mother-in-law—cut through these cozy domestic arrangements and free you for God. Well-meaning family members can be your worst enemies. If you prefer father or mother over me, you don't deserve me. If you prefer son or daughter over me, you don't deserve me" (The Message). For me, it was like Jesus was saying, "If you prefer your man and what he can provide for you over me, you don't deserve me."
OUCH.
That was all I needed to hear. So I applied. And I got accepted. And God is already rocking my world. My excitement builds every day as my World Race gets closer and closer. I can't wait to go.
A blog is a blog. I journal too. And in my journal, I'm totally honest with the world, myself, and God. Rarely do I share what I write in there. It's like a secret world. But check out this entry from November 19, 2011. Through it, see a little piece of my true heart feelings about the Race:
"6 months from today, I leave for training camp for the Race! How crazy is that?! God, I am so undeserving! I am so thankful that You would call me to this! In the next 6 months I want to fall even more in love with You. I want to grow to know You in a deeper way. Father, teach me things about your character and Your heart. Prepare my heart to share you with nations in a way that will truly impact them for eternity..."
3 years ago, I never would have dreamed of doing this. But I've seen and experienced the love of Jesus in such a tangible way over the last 2 years. How could I NOT share that?!
Until the whole world hears....
| |
|
|
|
|